It's Been One Year

Today makes one year since I got that awful phone call. One year since I rushed home to take Tim to the emergency room. One year since I stood over the bed begging God to spare him. One year since I watched him being loaded into a helicopter and flown to another hospital. One year since we raced by car to the hospital, not knowing if he had survived the flight there. One year since we sat at his bedside, completely helpless, unable to do a thing to help him. One year since God humbled us and showed us how little control we really have every single moment of every day. One year since I had no choice other than to place my son's life in God's hands, which was really just symbolic since that's where all our lives rest every second anyway, even when we don't acknowledge it.

It's been one year since God answered my prayers, and those of hundreds of people who interceded on our behalf, though it would be weeks before we knew that for sure. Looking at my Time Hop on Facebook this morning (a program that shows me the activity on my Facebook page for a particular date throughout the years), I was overcome with emotion as I read the frantic pleas for prayer. I remembered being so terrified and not able to get a good phone signal and finally getting in touch with my friend, asking her to post an urgent request for prayer so that as many people as possible could be praying. My friends in cyberspace responded in force. It was a Wednesday afternoon, and that night, across the land, believers in prayer meetings in churches we don't even know about lifted up Tim's name. Phone calls and texts and messages poured in, letting us know we weren't alone in crying out to God. We were lifted up and propped up by people who loved us, and it got us through the very long night, the following ten days in the hospital, and the months of recovery at home. We could not have made it without the prayer support of so many.

It's been one year since God slowed our busy lives down and forced us to focus on Him. One year since He so completely changed the way I think about things. One year since we realized that so many things we thought were important really meant nothing at all to us. One year since we began to re-prioritize things in our life.

It's been one year since God really showed me how involved He is in the tiny details. Things we might not normally notice, like the fact that the hospital they originally wanted to fly Tim to refused him because he was a pediatric patient.....but God knew that the highly qualified and much desired doctor we actually needed was already waiting at the other hospital. Or that a certain nurse that would go above and beyond the call of duty would be scheduled to work in the ICU that night, away from their normal cardiac care unit. Or when I needed a friendly comforting face in the original ER, in walked a nurse I actually knew and trusted, that I didn't even know worked there. God placed the right people in the right place, just when we needed them. That's no coincidence. It's also no coincidence that God placed a level headed friend with Tim during the wreck, so that someone would be there to get him home, call for help, keep him calm and still until I could get there, keep Ashley calm, help me load him in my car, and take care of things at my house for me. It was no coincidence that this happened right before Ashley left for church camp, where she would be distracted from worrying about her brother and where people who loved her could comfort her and allowing me to devote all my energy to Tim. God is in the little details.

It's been one year. It's been a lifetime and only a moment, at the same time. Some things have gotten back to normal, and some things never will. And as odd as it may sound, I am actually grateful for the events of one year ago. God used them to teach so many lessons. I can't say I'd choose to go through it again, voluntarily, because I'm just a weak human that avoids painful situations when I can. But I am so very grateful for the opportunity God gave us to learn to trust Him completely, to learn the power of prayer, to experience the love and compassion of others, to slow down and recognize what is truly important in life, and to watch Him work His wonders.

You may not have had such a dramatic reminder of God's power and love in the last year, but I guarantee that He's been at work in your life too. He's there in the big things as well as the small things. He's there in the big picture and the tiny details. And every day, in more ways than we can ever see, He shows us He loves and cares for us.

And if you are one of the many, many people who prayed for us, we thank you with all of our being.

Spiritual Famine

Ashley got a cotton candy machine for Christmas. You can use regular sugar, or even more fun, any type of hard candy to make the cotton candy. So we've had peppermint, spearmint, caramel, cinnamon, root beer, and various fruit flavored cotton candy. It's so cool to watch the hard candy tumble around for a minute, then suddenly, strands of cotton candy appear. Wispy, delicate, tasty strands of deliciousness appear where moments before a chunk of hardened sugar had been. I'm not sure if Ashley or Scott has enjoyed it the most.

I like cotton candy, but just a taste or two. Any more than that is just too much sweet for me. I did an experiment once as part of a diet program. You had to pick a favorite food that you normally wouldn't eat on a diet because it was “bad”. Then you had to eat that food, just that, at every meal. EVERY meal! Three times a day. For days and days. I chose ice cream. The first day, it was awesome. Here's a food I hadn't eaten in ages, because it was not healthy. Under the plan, you could have all you wanted. So I ate it and thoroughly enjoyed it, for breakfast. It was AWESOME! Lunch came around, and I had more ice cream. I was loving it. Supper time....ice cream. The next day, for breakfast, I had ice cream. It didn't taste quite as good the second day. Lunch rolled around, and I really wanted a turkey sandwich or something, but I had ice cream. By supper, I would have loved to have a real meal, but ice cream was all that was on the menu. By about the fifth day, I hated ice cream. I didn't just dislike it a little, I really, really hated it. The sight of ice cream, the smell, the texture, the bland look, all turned my stomach. After that little experiment, I didn't want ice cream for a very long time.

Cotton candy, ice cream, donuts, cake, cookies, junk food....all of it is fantastic in moderation. But if that's all you have, it leaves you wanting. It doesn't fill the nutritional needs of the body, so even though the stomach is full, your body craves other food. It yearns for the nutrition you really need, and it revolts at the junk food. God designed your body to know what it needs.

God designed your soul to know what it needs too. At times in my life, I have dug deep in God's Word and devoured the nourishment it provides. But there have been other times that I get busy and my Bible time and/or prayer time gets pushed aside. I grab a few verses here and there, I shoot a prayer upwards as I rush around, but it's superficial and not sustaining. It doesn't take too long before my soul starts to revolt. My soul knows I need that time in prayer and Bible study to grow and be healthy. And it doesn't take too long before my spiritual malnourishment starts to show. Thankfully, the cure is readily available. But sometimes it takes me a while to realize what my problem is. I never set out to forgo my Bible and prayer time. I just let myself get so busy that my quiet times become shorter and more interrupted and less focused until they are no longer much use. I get a little sustenance out of them, but not the deep nourishment I really need. And just like I never intend to stray into unhealthy eating habits, I sometimes get busy and grab something quick instead of slowing down and having the healthy meal I need. I have to force myself to take the time to fix the healthy food. And I have to force myself to take the time to nourish my relationship with Jesus.

I fear that many Christians are living on a junk food type of spiritual existence. I've talked to people who tell me they just don't have time to read the Bible, or that they intend to come to church, but they never do. I know people who find praying boring, or too time consuming. They run to God when there is a crisis, but otherwise, they subsist on the barest of spiritual disciplines that they can get by with. And it shows. Their faith is weak, their lives don't flourish, they don't grow in their spiritual life. You can get by that way, just like you can get by on donuts and Big Macs. But it won't be living life to the fullest. It won't be experiencing all the blessings God desires for you.

What about you? Are you living the abundant life, or are you you in a spiritual famine? God is always available.